{Why'd you have to be so clueless?.

20061108

11/08/2006 03:33:00 PM

"May judgement be served; May it correct mankind; May it create a beautiful world for us to live in!
And for such great judgement to be passed... my existence shall be its sacrifice!!"

My existence need not be my material body. It's up to the reader to decide, as i had already gone through that sacrifice.

There are some things in which we can never understand in life. Why is it that there are some who clearly don't need me in their lives, but they still insist that my existence is necessary. Look, how can i even exist in your life when i'm not even sure if i existed in my own life? How can you make up a false story such that even the inexistent knows that it's all a LIE?

take some time to digest if you need to. i won't explain much.

I was vetting her chem notes today, she has the potential, and i feel that i'm not needed by her. so.. i guess it's only a matter of time in which i might stop being her tutor. She herself already has the ability to guarantee her own grades. And besides, I can't teach when i don't put my feelings into it. Now hold on a sec, why would i have feelings when i just destroyed my emotions? Precisely, i can't teach anymore unless she makes me feel that i'm important. If not, then i'll just care about myself, i need to rebuild my own existence.

One more thing, maybe it's just my mind, but, i sense that there's something following me. I don't care what it is, all i know is that it's getting really frustrating. Is there even pure JUSTICE in this world? If there isn't, I shall be JUSTICE. I shall be the one who'll pass judgement on those who do not follow the laws of being human. Those who disobey, they will pay with their future. All that i'm doing is for the good of all mankind. I want to be the one who'll change this world, I want to live in a world that can be trusted. I want to be respected for who i am and what i do. Nothing must come into my way... NOTHING... defy me, and you'll see what happens next...

That's all the thoughts i have for today... time to continue to vet the notes of someone who doesn't need me as much.