{Why'd you have to be so clueless?.

20061011

10/11/2006 08:04:00 PM

Yes i know, i seem very free to you, blogging everyday... and indeed, i'm not that free after all... council work is piling up, tutorials too... really wonder what the heck i'm doing these days, totally slackened... rmb there was once i said i was a catalyst? now i'd concluded, i'm a heterogeneous catalyst. I provide a surface area for adsorption. okok... fine if you can't take the chemistry terms.

Basically, that day, i helped to solve my best friends probbo. i catalysed his thoughts, hoping to make him feel better (actually, i killed his emotions temporarily, i knew that it'll return, cos i've done that to myself before... lol, sorry dude, didn't warn ya about the side effects..). Well, he did feel better, in fact, he looked great for the next few days!! But seriously, look at the state of him now.. he's going all frustrated... GAH... emotions.

ok.. so now the reagent has polluted the catalyst... i'm polluted, now i can't even solve my own prob. nono, i'm not blaming him, i mean, yeah, i did my best to help a friend, and that only his WILLPOWER will be able pull him through the gate that blocks his path. and yes, i suggested something to him the other day, something that'll make his mind and will grow stronger. I asked him to stay with me at the cemetry for a night, any cemetry. YES, I KNOW YOU MIGHT THINK THIS IS CRAZY, BUT REALLY, IT'LL REALLY TRAIN UP YOUR COURAGE AND YUP... and well, he refused...

The worst fear of any individual is he himself. if he can't even conquer his inner self, he won't be fit to be in the position to pass judgement. he'll be irrational, irritated and agitated by the stuff around him. more or less becoming like a sore loser. But once he faces his fear of truth, he'll be enlightened, like what i said in the previous post. I mean.. no truth is as frightening as knowing yourself. okok.. perhaps you'll some time to figure this one out.. i'll give you that time.

"Aspire to seek the truth of life, and not perspire in the process of refusing the truth." I know that it's easier said than done.. I admit that even such a person like me can have frustrating moments. yes.. but i'm facing it. Will you do the same to lift that misery? or will you leave that knot untied in your heart? It's your choice...

Words are really all i have, in every relationship. I'm not saying that i'm just all words but no actions, but really, you'll see me giving you verbal solutions more than jumping into the sea to save you (unless the situation summons my presence.)

okok.. better return to my tutorial-ing, must stop thinking cos i think too much... yeah.. wonder why am i thinking this much about them in the first place... GAH emotions!!