{Why'd you have to be so clueless?.

20061010

10/10/2006 09:23:00 PM

today.. back to school once again... nono.. i mean back to PJC although literally.. i did return to my sec school today to publicise for PJC. How was it? you might ask.. well, the teacher-in-charge said that my speech was full of informal stuffs such as "shit" and "damned"... but somehow, at the end of everything, she said it was well done. LOL!! wonder what these teachers are thinking these days...

anyways.. it was really boring at PJC today, i mean... the teachers were like... GAH... "alright class, we have to carry on with our work..." and we were like dozing off on the tables... seriously, the new timetable sucks big time... wonder who's in the timetable planning committee.. i wanna smack his face!!

OK.. so in any case.. sigh.. went all the way to central manpower base at Depot road all because i need to renew my passport... I was so noob la.. i mean.. you see ppls holding guns you not scared meh? and those soldiers dun smile at all!! GAH.. how weird.. they are humans too.. so i got my stuff done and yep.. blahs..

Sometimes.. i really feel at a loss.. i dun quite care about the family now, i mean.. yeah.. not that i'm unfilial... but it's just that, i really have other things to fret about. Stuff like whether i'll be promoted, stuff like what i'll be facing in council in the future, and of course, stuff like who i like... i mean, we all reach a certain age when we feel that the family cannot give us the happiness that we want... this is kinda like a new feeling.. but somehow, some people refuse to accept it, even though they know they should be doing so.

In terms of human relations, follow your heart more than your brain... in terms of passing judgement, follow your brain more than your heart. many people have this problem of being unable to do both, i'm also among those who is only able use my brain and not my heart...

But it is only recently that i realised... being stuck in the middle of these two powerful entities... it's really painful... it's a struggle, you know you like that person, but your brain tells you no, and yet, it's also telling you yes if you really feel that it can work out. so... is there a way out? is there really a solution? And... is that solution to leave that person or to ignore that person?

The answer is obviously NO!! we, as humans, should face things head on, even though the collision might hurt abit... but seriously, even though it might leave a scar, does it even matter? since she came into your life, there must be a specific reason why. it's either to let you learn a lesson or to be with you forever. In any case, equivalent trade seems to apply here too.. so just go figure it out yourselves... really, i dunno what to say... I'm as frustrated as anyone else is now when it comes the word called "LOVE".

i guess.. life just comes in such a package that you can't avoid, even though the parcel might contain a bomb, we'll just have to face it... it's the truth that we wish to acquire, but we fear it... and yet once the truth is acquired, we'll all learn something new... and the whole cycle starts again when a new truth in life is to be acquired...